X out of 10

Look, I’m a huge proponent of protecting the planet. I’m all for utilizing the advanced technologies we have perfected in recent years (superefficient solar power and less-scary nuclear power spring immediately to mind), as well as adopting regulations that are both realistic and market-friendly (”Whaaa?” you say, “market-friendly environmental regulations?!” Yes, there is such a thing, but that’s a different matter for a different time).

With that said, I’ve never been a fan of pro-environment groups like Greenpeace, who seem to be more about protecting the image of Greenpeace than about protecting the environment. Their moronic publicity stunts have left a permanently sour taste in my mouth. But I figured they had less-obnoxious older brothers in groups like the Sierra Club. I’m just beginning to realize, however, that the Sierra Club is not Greenpeace’s less-obnoxious older brother—rather, it is the older brother with pre-senile dementia and a diminished sense of self-worth that borders on the pitiful. How can I possibly make such assertions about America’s oldest environmental organization? If it please the jury, I’d like to present Exhibit A, a photograph of a membership solicitation package, which I seem to receive in the mail every other month, but have never once requested (click the thumbnail to the left to see a full-sized version). Read more »

Apple finally announced their mobile phone/widescreen iPod/mobile internet browser device this morning at the Macworld keynote. I, for one, can’t wait to get my mitts on this bad boy. Features wifi, multi-touch touchscreen, quad-band, GSM+EDGE, simple operation with only one physical button, etc. etc. etc. X-rating to come very soon, I’m sure (gotta replace my pile-o’-crap RAZR as soon as possible).

UPDATE: Looks like the iPhone won’t be out ’til June, and it’ll be pricey, but methinks it’ll be worth it.

The world is made of two kinds of people: those who love Bond movies and those who loathe them. I consider myself part of the former camp, especially when it comes to the classic films starring Sean Connery. The fourth and final set in the James Bond Ultimate Edition collection combines two of these classics (Dr. No and You Only Live Twice) with one of the better Pierce Brosnan films (Tomorrow Never Dies), a middling Roger Moore film (Octopussy) and the so-remarkably-bad-you-can’t-help-but-love-it Moonraker (also starring Moore). Read more »

Typically, the word “cashmere” is used in place of the word “expensive” or the phrase “designed for chicks.” This sweater may be some of the former, but certainly not the latter. Cashmere, the wonder-wool, makes this sweater extremely soft and comfortable, while keeping the wearer quite warm despite its light weight and low bulk. Plus, no matter what the fashion trend, argyle will always be cool.

X = 8.5

Buy it at Nordstrom.com

A chilling movie inspired by (and far better than) P.D. James’ novel of the same name, Children of Men presents a frighteningly realistic image of a dystopian Britain in 2027. The women of this world have been unable to conceive since 2009, and the ever-aging citizens of earth prepare for their ultimate, unavoidable extinction. Around the world, violence runs rampant, and terrorism of the most vile, destructive sort has rendered most of the planet’s major cities depleted or uninhabitable. At the same time, the final generation of humans to be born are international celebrities, whose precise ages, down to the minute, are known to all.

The film centers on Theo Faron, who in a previous life was somewhat of an activist, but who now whittles away the days at his low-level desk job and bathes his liver in scotch regularly. On his way home from work one day, Theo is abducted by the pro-immigrant group known as The Fishes, which happens to be led by Theo’s ex-wife, Julian. Julian implores Theo to use his position to secure a pair of hard-to-come-by travel permits with the hopes of reaching a mysterious offshore collective of scientists dedicated to restoring the human species known as The Human Project. Read more »

Yep, it’s been quite a while since the mighty hand of X Out of 10 dealt a product-making-or-breaking X-rating. To all of my reader (yeah, that’s singular for a reason): sorry, my bad. What can I say, this holiday season was a crazy one. Anyway, expect some good stuff today and in the days to come.

Above all, this Christmas taught me that Hugh Hefner had it right all these years. I’m not talking about the way in which he surrounds himself with beautiful, scantily-clad blondes, or how he enjoys the finest things money can buy, or even the way he opens his mansion up to Hollywood A-listers and world leaders alike. No, I’m talking instead about Hef’s preferred choice of attire: the robe.

The robe is, quite possibly, the perfect lounging accessory. Any given robe’s level of perfection (oh yes, there are levels) is directly proportionate to the softness or “fluffiness” (as it is known in scientific circles) of the material. For this reason, the CozyChic robe from Barefoot Dreams is—if you can get past the dreadful, borderline-emasculating names of both the product and the brand—perhaps the most perfect robe I have ever had the pleasure of owning. The polyester material, which has the appearance of well-loved terry cloth, is unbelievably soft and warm; it feels like a warm cozy blanket that just happens to have armholes, pockets, and a belt round the waist. It ain’t cheap, but it’s worth it.

Now if only I had the scantily-clad blondes to go with it.

X = 9.5

Buy it at Nordstrom.com

User testimonials, as anyone who has taken Advertising 101 will tell you, can be one of the most powerful means of persuasion. A simple, genuine testimonial from an actual user of any given product can easily take the place of volumes of the most persuasive copywriting. With that in mind, X Out of 10 proudly submits its first-ever video review, featuring guest contributor Baxter.

Buy it at PoliticalPetToys.com

I wasn’t expecting Citizen Kane, but I guess I expected the guys who did Super Troopers to create a movie that was… I don’t know… funny. Instead, they created a movie that was just plain horrible: horrible script, horrible acting, and horrible execution.

The Broken Lizard guys took a concept that could have been hilarious—come on, a beer-drinking competition is practically a gimme in the raunchy buddy comedy genre—and completely wasted it, resorting to pee and fart jokes, base ethnic stereotypes, and generally over-the-top, absurd humor. This movie could have been this generation’s Animal House; instead, save for a scant few worthwhile scenes, Beerfest is a disappointing failure.

X = 1.2

Buy Beerfest (Unrated Widescreen Edition) at Amazon.com

These days, it seems like the Top Albums of the year list has supplanted the New Year’s Resolution as the most often over-shared bit of personal information. So of course, I wouldn’t feel complete without creating a list of my own.

The ten albums in this list represent the music I’ve enjoyed most this year, and as such is quite a different list than you’d see on other blogs, where critics worry more about their cred than their actual preferences. But that’s just not how I roll, no sir.

Read on for the list. Read more »